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Tuesday, 10 October 2017

Sheep Fields - and the love & worries of motherhood

Is there anything better than family time? Recently we popped up to visit Dann's parents for the weekend and it was just the nicest chill weekend. There's something about those cosy weekends with family with lots of food, walks and play time.

We always make sure we get outdoors lots as the village is set in the middle of beautiful countryside and I really think the country is so important for young minds.

This always includes a dog walk through the sheep fields, which is a popular trip. Spending time with the dog and his grandparents is one of Henry's favourite things, and seeing them all together definitely makes up for the restless nights and the distance we travel.
Although we don't live thousands of lies away from the grandparents it's a good hour and a half to two hours journey time in the car. And with a busy lifestyle, finding time to visit can be tricky.

There are so very many perks to being a parent. All the smiles, cuddles, laughter and adventures. It seriously is the best thing in the world. I so often watch Henry exploring or discovering something new and it makes my heart swell with pride and love.

However motherhood also comes with constant worry. And the guilt can be very real. I so want Henry to have a close relationship with his grandparents and the amount of love he shows them when we visit proves he does love them a lot but I do wish we all lived a bit closer. Family is so important especially as we don't have that many close friends nearby.

A few days after these photos were taken we heard about the horror of the mass shooting in Las Vegas. My heart and soul weeps for all those that lost their lives and the families torn apart by such mindless hate. And it's another worry. The hate in the world just seems to continue growing, and finding a way to keep our children safe seems an ever impossible task. The solace I take is that my boy seems to be a helper, which I hope will mean that if he is every faced with such terror, he will be brave, and he will help.

Aside from the outside world, we have the everyday struggles. 
Does he socialise enough? 
Do we see our family enough? 
Is he eating enough? 
Is he happy? 
Does he feel safe?
Will he always feel safe and happy?
What about the future? What does that hold for him?

It's a forever battle. And I know this to be true as even my own mother worries still, and two of us don't live at home anymore. 

I'm OK with knowing that I will always worry, because the love, oh that love, is so worth it. 
Seeing his face light up when he sees me. When he cuddles in close after he's fallen over, or wants to sleep. The excitement in finding the cat or trying a new toy. Seeing him grow up. It's all so worth the worry. 



  1. I seem to always be worrying about something! I have spoken to mum friends about this and it definitely seems to be more of a mum thing. Dads worry of course but it doesn't seem to be in the same way. Those red leaves are beautiful, by the way x

  2. You totally sum up how I feel. I am always worrying. Hoping that they feel safe and loved and that we do see family enough. It is such a big juggling act and so much to make sure we are doing. It looks like you had a lovely weekend visiting family. The dog walks sound lovely. Very similar to what we get up to when visiting family in Wales. xx


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